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The Signs of Spiritual Delusion

by Cross Bringer

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1.
”Благоухание” Are you there? I hope you can hear me. I’ll wait. I’ve put two stones on my eyelids as you said. I fell asleep and I can’t see anything. Are you there? I don’t feel scared but I do feel alone. Please, please let me know you’re there. Please. I’m begging you I am so lost. Please. Angel In the light Please come And save me. Give me Just one sign I’m lost And empty. Blinding Light as air You can not Save me. * * * * * * * * * *
2.
”Видение красных огоньков” Set these arrows on fire! Bright as day, Cold as night, Sharp as teeth Blades of steel will cut the flesh with ease Cause some were never meant to live. Misery of existence is all that they have… Setting out on the quest To chase those running away. Don’t run, cause the torture will be worse Come here… Save yourselves! (such a bad advice) You are doomed, You are cursed, You are destined to fail, You are nothing more than a moving material Whose days are numbered, and you are running away? Fools… Well, I’m glad you have hope… I’ve abandoned mine and I’ve joined the legions Now we ride night and day harvesting those like you. There’s another one, were you trying to hide? When you’re out of breath, When your limbs get numb, Lay onto the ground And wait for me to come. It will take no time; just prepare a dime To secure your passage through the Styx Have a good one, martyr, farewell… * * * * * * * * * *
3.
”Слышание голосов” The visions of stagnation The loss of dedication The staging of submersion The grade of reimbursion Never-ending, self-inflicted Harm, that we all enjoy Burning incense ain’t gonna help the misery, Sacrifices won’t affect the loss of innocence Congregation Re-ascension Fornication Procreation We are waiting for a sign Salt, dirt, bread, blood Congregation Re-ascension Fornication Procreation Like father like son As soon as the dust sets There is one single ray that Separates the earth and the sky. The shadows are long and motionless, The air is clean and full of this Unsettling waiting for a sign. The light, the dust, the soil that breaks wide open The sweat, the tears, of those who tried to build and failed… Creation Tarnation Resurrection Isolation Segregation Exploitation Condemnation Immolation Congregation Re-ascension Fornication Procreation… * * * * * * * * * *
4.
”Самоубийство” * * * * * * * * * *
5.
”Дмение” In haze, The steps retreat… Confused in sorrow, Blindsided and misled I cannot follow Someone as malevolent. Running away when it gets dark… Secretive Negative I swore to never open up to anyone again. The time-consuming sacrifices, The promises we couldn’t keep, The trust… I can’t believe it’s faded, I can’t get a grip on mist Concealed aggression Reinforced frustrations Ricocheting pain and fear Off the walls of self-disgust Was it naive of me To think it could exist, The happiness and peace * * * * * * * * * *
6.
”Мокротная сладость” Distant parent, Long abandoned Child that’s searching In the dark. Reinforced with Silver crosses, Helpless, hopeless Fell apart. Was it worth it, Kiss and hurt it, Smash and heal it, Make it stop. Free and trap it, Beg to let it, Have its ways and Start the chase again. You don’t know the fuck you want. You will get what you deserve, and more: I hope you choke on your own choices. I’ll be praying, I’ll be begging, I’ll be hoping I’ll be patient, I’ll be silent, I’ll be counting rosaries On the ground Around me Pages turn To fallen leaves Thorns are made For drawing blood Question is, who’ll fall apart… Let’s hope, Let’s beg, Let’s pray Do as i say, Do as i say, Do as i say Don’t ask, Don’t dare, Don’t touch Repetition is key! Hope they won’t draw That warmth from your blood Wallow in dirt Praying they’ll stop Smell of the roses, Tears on the leaves and Drops on the mosaic floor… You’ve begged, You’ve prayed, You’ve hoped Smashed your head against the floor Didn’t ask, Didn’t dare, Didn’t touch Trusted too much, what for, Stared at the silent wet floor Remember, Repetition is key! Where have they been all of this time, Witnessing you getting lost. Spreading your arms in the dark, Thinking you’re hearing a ghost. You / Are / The / Ghost * * * * * * * * * *
7.
”Левитация” I confess! Forever enslaved By my own hate Trapped in a room (with) The one i can’t stand One day it has to stop. Trying my hardest and failing Planning upfront and bailing Seeing the darkness unveiling Tying a rope to a railing Clawing my eyes out every time I see this face appear It’s oozing shit, without a reason I want to disappear (I can’t) I cannot find a single thing I tolerate enough I try to think of the good deeds, it feels just like a bluff I cannot trust myself enough to talk to others too Self-deprivation has been winning, telling me what’s ‘true’: Worthless piece of shit Angry fucking twat Obsessive freak Dysphoric maniac Whose will to live still lingers… (I am) Choosing for life, Checking my time, Wasted on strife Heartache and grime; Reasons to live, Be more humane To myself first: No more pain. * * * * * * * * * *

about

The Signs of Spiritual Delusion was recorded just before the outbreak of the global pandemic and resonates with the current atmosphere of confusion, deprivation and madness. The album represents phases of the phenomenon called Prelest: absence of reference points, obsession and the search for new meanings, when the existing value system is already crumbling, and the new one has not yet been created. Prelest is also an intermediate state, a crisis of faith, in which illusions deceive, tempt, take possession of consciousness, and fantasies lead to obsessions. We all, one way or another, are in a state of search for verity, trying to escape from harmful illusions and get rid of false ideals, muffle haunting inner voices, but we don’t always realise we’re not alone in this. Signs of spiritual surrender are often similar, we just need to be able to recognise them and not let them completely enslave us, so that there’s no turning back.

We hope that those who this record resonates with know that they are not alone in this crisis, chaos and uncertainty. Do not fall under the spell of dictatorships. Seek truth through kindness. Welcome change.

The 7-track album is a journey through illusions, delusions, anger, grief, agony, deprivation, self-loathing and obsession, guided through by hallucinations, flash-backs, voices and prayers, giving space to reflection, obtainment of self-control and much needed resurrection of self, stepping into the new cycle of martyrdom that is yet to be broken.

credits

released September 18, 2020

Acknowledgments:

Drums recorded at DTH Studio, Moscow (Russia) curated by Ilya Marvel;
Guitars and vocals recorded at BuzzyLick Studio, Saint-Petersburg (Russia) curated by Aleksey Aleksandrov;
Mixing by Luc Ferre, Toulouse (France);
Mastering by Thibault Chaumont at Deviant Lab, Poitiers (France);
Artwork by Dehn Sora.

Released on Consouling Sounds.

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Cross Bringer Saint Petersburg, Russia

Cross Bringer is a new four-piece band founded by members of Euglena and The Homeless is Dead in 2019. Despite the kilometers separating the members (who are currently located in Belgium and Russia), they managed to record their debut album The Signs of Spiritual Delusion, which will be released September, 18, 2020 on Consouling Sounds. ... more

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